*WARNING: The ReRackNetwork does not condone the consumption of alcohol for people under the age of 21. This article is for fun and entertainment.*
Quarantine has been shit. Not being able to go out and booze with the boys or sip chardonnay with the girls has been a real bummer. We have been stuck at home having to booze virtually on zoom, or if you have strict parents not booze at all. That’s a goddamn tragedy. Luckily my parents are chill and don’t mind if I knock back 15-20 cold ones with the boys while 6-0ing kids on the search and destroy. This is a list of the top 5 beers to drink during these tough times.
5. Landshark Lager, 4.6%, 12 Pack=$14.99
You can’t not like landshark. Every sip tastes like a beach with loud music in the middle of the summer. I’m a huge Landshark fan. It’s a bit pricey for college kids but if you have the money for it, I highly recommend treating yourself. The can is dope as well.
4. Natty Light, 4.2%, 30 Pack=$19.99
This is your classic frat party keg beer. Just like Landshark reminds you of the beach, Natty reminds you of a dirty fraternity basement. Oh the memories. I don’t mind natty light. It’s cheap and easy to throw back. It’s a classic cheap choice and itll get you to where you’re going. Drunk, itll get you drunk.
3. Bud Light Lime, 4.2%, 24 Pack=$26.99
If you want to be a fucking pussy and drink a 30 pack of these out of cans be my guest. But, civilized humans know that bottled beer is far supirier. Limes are taking the spot where corona should be but since this hole coronvirus bullshit is at its height… fuck corona. Limes are a great beach beer like Landshark but they just hit different. I have never drank a lime and regreated it. Also if your drinking limes hear me out. Pour a slpash of grenadine(the red shit that goes in a shirely temple) in it. I know what your thinking “Shep your insane beer is beer its great because you don’t need anything to make it better.” I hear you beer is best unaltered but the bartender at my sisters sweet 16 showed me this trick and believe me it slaps.
2. Dino Nugs, 8%, 6 Pack=$16
Fellas you know he fucking vibes. IPA time to slay. You are probably think “Shep you fucki g idiot what the fuck is dino nugs beer”. Well step into my office and let me enlighten you. Double Nickel Brewing company is a new brewing company in South Jersey and they have Dino Nugs. Honestly the beer isn’t that good but it brings back childhood memories and even memories from a couple months ago. Yea I still eat dino nugs. Yes they are for children. Do I give a fuck, no. Let me live my best life. Look at the can though. It looks like it was designed straight out of the Louvre. This can is beautiful and thats why its ranked so high. I make the list, you read it, thats how this goes.
1. Miller Highlife, 4.6%, 24 Pack= $22
If you don’t like the Champagne of beers than don’t read my articles. Any article that I release about beers this will reign supreme like the Un family in North Korea. I love highlife. Its a grewat brew, its keep, the cans are sexy, the bottles are sexier. You can’t go wrong with this one. Plus, the Champagne of Beer is undoubtly the best line about beer. Fuck find your beach from Corona or King of beer from budwiser. I am a classy gent and I will drink a classy beer. The first time I drank Highlife was unforgetable. Me and my brother housed a 30 rack in his dorm at Penn State and in the middle of the night I woke up, blew chunks all over the floor and went back to sleep. I was instantly in love with the beer from that point on.
This article is completely biased towards the beer I like. If you read my articles you are probably a degegerate like myself. Thank you for attending my Ted Talk.
Also if you find this 40 in a store please contact me immediately. Look at this shit it’s fucking beautiful and I must find it.